Happy New Year!

Here in 2026 I think we’re all ready for a little less stress and a little more fun. Before I get into todays topic, which is all about JOY, I want to let you know I have a new YouTube video out.

If you’ve ever tried to be supportive and accidentally made your partner feel worse, you’ll relate to not always knowing the difference between empathy and sympathy. HERE is my reaction to Brené Brown’s viral “Empathy vs. Sympathy Video” where I give the overview of what empathy looks like in the real world and then walk you through how to practice Skydiving Listing with a step-by-step flowchart.

Okay on to today’s topic.

In my office, a lot of couples say the same thing: “We’re fine but we want to be better than fine.” Who doesn’t want to actually feel the joyfulness that all the holiday cards have been promising us?

As you know, joy isn’t a personality trait, nor does it appear out of thin air. It’s a practice.

Here are 5 simple, doable ways to bring more lighthearted connection and warmth into your relationship in 2026.

1) Make a Grateful/Great-For list

Once a week, write down then read out loud:

• 3 things you appreciate about your partner or your relationship (Grateful)
• 1 thing you’d like to do together in the near future (Great-for-us)

Example:

• “You know just how to make me laugh.”
• “You’re such a great parent.”
• “Thanks again for making our holidays so special.”
• “I’d love to start taking walks with you on Saturday mornings again.”

2) Listen to More Music This Year

They did a study at the Behavioral Science Institute in the Netherlands that showed a direct correlation between listening to music and reduced stress.

This one is so easy to do it’s almost silly not to at least try it as it can be a great way to wake up a little bit when life seems flat.

Once a week, turn on some music together, maybe it’s a song you loved when you were younger, or maybe it’s music that creates the very mood that you want to feel.

Joy often shows up when you just add music to a monotonous task. Try turning on the tunes during the following tasks and notice if it makes a difference while:

• cooking dinner
• cleaning up
• running errands in the car

3) Go On a Relationship “Field Trip”

Same house + same couch = same mood.

The only difference between a routine and a field trip is that a field trip is something NEW.

I haven’t seen any research on this, but when my clients have trouble sleeping, one of the core principles of sleep hygiene is to change things up a little. Like putting your head where your feet usually go, a small change can make all the difference.

So you can bring simple joy to your relationship by making a tiny change, and thinking of it as a field trip with your partner:

• Try a new coffee shop
• Eat a meal in a different room in your home
• Grocery shop together and buy 5 new items you’ve never purchased before

You don’t need a big date night. This is all about NEWNESS

4) Outsource for Free

If both of you are feeling stressed, joy gets squeezed out (and resentment can even build.)

You might get annoyed when people just tell you to hire help because not only does that cost money, but it also takes time and effort to find someone you trust when you’re already starved for time.

This recommendation brings us back to a community/kibbutz mindset, because it’s all about finding creative ways to help one another out.

• Babysitting co-op for date nights: Pair up with one other family (or make a small pod of 3–4 families), Each month, one couple hosts the kids for 2–3 hours while the other couple gets a date night. Rotate. Everyone gets child-free time without paying a sitter.
• Trade tasks with Your Parnter: Maybe there’s a chore your partner is doing that you’d rather do and vice versa but you never stopped to talk about whether your current division of chores makes sense.

• Offer and Receive Help: Tell your neighbors when you’re going to Cosco and ask if they need anything. Then when they return the offer, take them up on it! (This can save an entire trip for everyone)

The point is this: If you’re doing it all yourself, it’s hard to feel joyful.

5) Schedule Your Celebration Now

Don’t wait until you’re “happy” to celebrate, celebrate to create happiness. And this all comes down to picking a future moment in the calendar. Spontaneity is great, but joy also likes appointments.

Here are some ideas:

• Take a weekend staycation in the middle of March.
• Schedule a random day off together on a Wednesday in April.
• Commit to planning a milestone celebration (birthday, anniversary etc) now to make sure you’re not throwing something together last minute.

Put it on the calendar.

Start Tonight

If this list feels like a lot, choose one:

• A 10-minute field trip walk to somewhere different
• One great-for-us idea
• Ask spotify to “Play some joyful music!”

Hope that’s enough to begin.

Much Warmth and Appreciation,
 Laura

And here’s the Brene Brown Reaction Video: